THE TURNING POINT This page gives you a high magnification survey of the thinking that takes an individual around the corner from the Old era to the New. It is a guide to illustrate common thoughts that surface through this process. There may be times when one feels one is straddling a number of stages simultaneously or where one feels discretely in one area for...however long they need to be. Movement through the stages is a very individual process; someone can be at a stage for years and at another stage for just a few hours, depending on the guidance, assistance or treatment they are receiving and the events taking place in their life. This chart provides you with a tool to understand that a distinct process is taking place and that each stage passes and moves on to the next (just in case you have been in one place for a long time and were wondering...). MINUS NUMBERS People who show up in what would be the minus numbers are not ready to embark on the transition. There are experiences for them to have that are still part of their old story of life before they are ready. This group very likely doesn’t have an interest in philosophical, psychological or metaphysical matters. It is not part of their world. For now. ‘Normal’, ‘ordinary’ or ‘simple’ in their lifestyle, they are not involved in much more than the mundane-ness of having regular (and usually, similar) meals, going to work, marriages, birthdays, raising children, etc. They keep the balance for everybody else, who, in waves, are making their way through this evolutionary leap and around this evolutionary corner. APPROACHING THE CURVE Here there is a line-up of people who are sensing that life is not how it used to be. Things are happening to them in a way that has them thinking, “Something is going on.” Be it their sleep patterns, relationships, health, work, world/spiritual/life views...there is a trembling that has started. (From here I will refer to 'you' as if you have come this far in the website, it's likely this is relevant to you, has been or soon will be) 1 - There is the distinct feeling that nothing in life is working. Strong feelings of dismay and confusion push you to figure out 'how to fix it', largely because you thought it was once 'working' or because you think it is 'working' for others. The bottom-line, though, is that nothing is functioning as it used to. The pastimes that used to help (drinking, socializing, sports, media, entertainment...) now seem futile 'escapes' from reality - a reality that is becoming increasingly uncomfortable and evidently inescapable.
2 -You recognize that referring to your old manual for life isn't helping. What you knew doesn't seem to be doing the trick. You now start looking beyond what you knew for alternative ways to get things back on track. A new venture is explored, a new approach with which you vow to use greater resolve, new reading material, workshops, anything to inject new blood (into a failing situation) is considered. Repeatedly you are asking, “What can I/we do to get things back on an even keel?” There also comes a closer examination of this 'off-balance' feeling. All ways of being and doing are obviously affected; relationships (personal, social and at work) are disjointed, health and/or finances are likely also 'sensitive areas'. You have a belief that there must be an alternative way of bringing balance to the situation, to get it back to how things were; you just need to find what that thing is. Eventually it becomes apparent that despite trying to make things work with new ideas, in one's heart there is a whisper (or louder) telling you that the situation is beyond help. As is common, the heart is ignored and the brain overrides this insight, strategising to fix and work it out with further novel methods.
3 - Getting into 3, the reaching out has intensified to a tugging on energy from outside yourself. There is a pulling on other people and places or information to help you return to how life was when it felt secure. You believe you are unable to get back to security alone and there is a certainty that others hold the answers. Without realizing it, a continuous 'drawing on others' results; especially (it can be unknowingly) on those who seem to have worked through what you haven't. At this stage there's much helpless or victim thinking, where rather than being your own guiding force (this feels impossible) you are flailing, knowing that things are a mess. It 'appears' that there is no other option but to continue to pull on these others (friends, partners, teachers, mentors...). This stage sees much complaining rather than going deeper within to find the root causes of the situation. Here we see the difference between those that recognise that something is going on; who let go and let it all crumble, and those who hold on to their ego...pain...story...identity etc…trying to find a way back. Getting from 3 to 4 hinges on letting go. This is a major step which, until taken, has you stuck at 3 for as long as it takes for you to 'get it'. Being stuck here constitutes not only the looking outside yourself for answers, but an ongoing blaming of the outside world for making life so hard.
4 - With the letting go comes a big "Aha!" realisation. Here, it clicks into place that something much bigger is going on and the world hasn't got a personal vendetta against you. The ‘blame-shame’ game that has been going on is seen in a new light. At this point it's clear that everything 'out there' is a mirror of yourself, bringing with it the realization that, “This is something I am going to have to deal with myself if I am to get through it.” This surrender allows a major opening to take place, a real expansion in consciousness. This stage is critical, as now the individual is a major step closer to surrendering to their vulnerabilities and being cracked wide open at 6. Unless this stage is completed it is impossible to move ahead to starting the death of the ego (all that you think 'I am' is) at 5.
5 - Surrendering to vulnerability (in 4) has allowed the dam to crack. This is where all levels and workings of the ego begin to seep through. This stage is usually only reached with the admission or plea: "I am so broken that I will do whatever it takes" or "I don't know what the hell is going on here, but I am in so much pain and suffering that I will trust that there is something bigger than me (and all that I built 'me' up to mean) that will guide me out of my insanity/misery". You may think this, "something bigger" is God, spiritual guides, fate, a universal force, pure consciousness...For now it doesn't matter. What matters is that in this moment your ego steps out of the way of your intuition, let's call it. Surrender and trust are crucial elements of stages 4, 5 and beyond. Our intuition, inner guidance, higher self (whatever you label it) has taken such a battering over the years (and centuries) that most of us aren't only ignoring it, most of us have long-since been questioning whether it exists. Surrendering and trusting that it does may take some time to foster, but without doing so there is nothing else to continue the momentum. The ego and its stories only act as breaks on your expansion. It is possible to observe during low points, when you see yourself as a "victim of all this", that trust evades you and you feel like you are drowning. When trust comes in (and I'm not saying it's easy - how many of us live with complete trust in our lives? How many of us have been through anything like this before?! It takes some practice), it is like having a float being thrown to you accompanied by a small, but growing, voice telling you what to do next. This voice of intuition, is different to the ego's voice; discerning between the two also takes practice. As you stabilise, gaining some buoyancy, you gather the strength to honestly see the dark corners of your long-since locked psychological basement, which is beginning to spew out. Thoughts you haven't wanted to look at now appear right in front of your eyes. Co-dependent behaviors and addictive processes, in particular begin to show themselves to you. 'Surrender to being the objective observer' is the float you are now holding on to, holding on to this is what carries you through this ongoing release. This volcanic unleashing of ego imbalances takes many guises which a multitude of people will deal with in a multitude of ways, usually by using a childhood coping strategy e.g. sulking ('poor me, fuck you'), being the victim, wounded child, using theatrics, being the 'centre of attention', retreating etc. Often a large amount of emotion that has built up cannot be contained any longer and also needs releasing. If you can see these childhood coping mechanisms playing out and can drop the act, 'it' will all pour out much more easily. These are obstacles we put in the way of our own freedom! If you have been involved in years of personal development work, therapy and spiritual learning you may notice despair and even anger (at the world, the universe or God) arise because you are still having to suffer through this release after "all the work that I have done". "How can it be that after everything I have done and been through there are still remaining imbalances that are creating all of this pain?". Again, the key is to let it all go, holding on to your story will only hold up the process - you are where you are now. What is clear through this is how powerful our cover-up mechanisms have been - they have covered us up from ourselves! This took the form of addiction to ego; the identity (who you are, what you do, what your story is...), being happy all the time, being the victim all the time, sexual addictions, co/counter dependency addictions, addiction to beautifying the self and playing the beautiful role, being centre of attention, being the self-sacrificial nun/monk, the sorcerer/magician, the healer/superhero and the many other archetypes we proudly associated ourselves with. As these different roles are seen, thoughts of being 'better than' or 'less than' lose their strength. This leads to the awareness of what they were hiding underneath. What first shows up is embarrassment or shame of the game you have been playing. It is easy to punish yourself (or/to be a victim) but this again is part of another thought pattern, another obstacle to just letting it all go and moving on.
6 - At this stage comes total surrender, a continuing theme of The Shift if you hadn't yet noticed. Here, even having gone through 1-5 the only option that remains is to surrender completely. Whether voluntarily or involuntarily, there is a knowing that whatever awaits, the only way is forward. There is no going back as that was all evidently all illusory. Everything that existed was based on perception and how your mind 'managed' those perceptions. This crack at 6 allows a complete falling away of who you were, which was ego-based and saw the self and the world through separation. It opens a space to allow something new in, even though there is no notion of what that is. It is because of the fundamental awakening to "nothing in our life working" and that it was based largely on ideas from childhood that we have clung on to, that we see there is nothing left to lose. Here we allow a huge axe down on the cracked dam to accelerate the clear-out of everything that came before. It's an achievement to arrive at 6. It's the turning point of The Turning Point! Clambering through stages 1-5 was accompanied by health distortions, disrupted sleep and periodic exhaustion. 1 through to 5 were not the solution, they were the stepping stones to this opening. Between 6 and 7, this is the start of the external purge, an ongoing process for as long as necessary, even beyond the 12 of the curve. At this stage, there is a clearing of the immediate exterior environment of 'things' that belonged to the old you that you have broken away from. All the things around you are part of the old energy. Every item you own carries a story with it from your old life. It's interesting here to see the initial resistance and excuses we have to parting with these very 'special' things. However, despite initial resistance you start to see nothing seems to fit. Nothing from the old life fits with the new person you are emerging to be and the person you have a notion of becoming. You are frustrated or irritated by the memories that are triggered by the different items and how they weigh you down, rather than feeling sentimental about them as you once did. You get rid of clothes, photographs, furniture - even items recently acquired. You become aware of why many items were bought or hoarded. You see that it was addictive coping patterns at play. Eventually, near everything goes (because there is so much resistance to this, this purging carries on through the subsequent stages and longer - doing it at once is like ripping a heroin-coated dummy from an addicted child - forgive the analogy if it offends, but you get my point. For some, it can be too much too soon). The person’s possessions begin to look obsolete even if they are new. They all belong to the old thinking. These are the old ways, the old cover ups of burying what was inside. People do this 'purge' in increments, thinking some items are 'necessary', then days/weeks/months/years later seeing it all as just ‘stuff’ taking up space. Alternatively, going through a natural or man-made disaster ensures the process is instant. Often the Purpose*, 'I want to be special' is at the root of our collections of books, clothes, shoes, gadgets, music, photographs, technology, alter items…The more we notice this in ourselves, and the discomfort this recognition brings, the sooner we eventually just "want rid of it!" Important to note: if one progresses with clearing more of the internal without clearing out the external, they will be sprung back to an earlier place on the curve. One cannot progress unless significant amounts of the old items have been voluntarily discarded, otherwise they create a positive feedback of old thought patterns.
7 - There is a revisiting to what else needs to be cleared. With the space that begun being created at 6, any obstruction or interference stands out. Still focused on the immediate external circumstances and environment, now even unnecessary digital information is wiped...old 'hoarded' computer files, email addresses, contact lists, old music that bring back old memories...it all goes. Relationships that are stagnant naturally fade out; in fact anything in stagnation clears away. Eventually most clothing goes. Clothes perpetuate what we think about ourselves and what we wanted others to think about us. Anything unnecessary or that feeds the old thinking is discarded. There may be little inclination to replace anything until this intense transitional and transformational period begins to settle down. How can one know what to replace it all with? The new person is yet to emerge. A few sets of simple clothes keep you going in the meantime. It may be that some items are replaced almost identically by way of necessity, but they will be of the new energy now and will fit into your new space. Temporarily or permanently? You will see.
8 - After (and during) this extensive examination of our external environment, it is glaringly obvious how much has reflected our lives on the inside. Becoming sensitive to this pervades our awareness and there evolves an ongoing sensitivity to the relationship between situations and people (out there) and our own unfinished business (in here). Whatever is seen taking place around us, we know is reflecting ourselves back to us. The tendency is to blame others rather than to go deeper. This has to be recognised to be able to see instead the mirrors (the people and situations) that are only there to trigger us, to help us identify our issues to be cleared. Let 'them' live their lives according to their own choices - just as you want them to allow you to. Money, jobs, immediate relationships, family, childhood issues and whatever unfinished business (even past life memories - regardless of whether you believe in them) begin to surface frequently, even on a daily basis, to be cleared. There may be thoughts that are connected to the collective consciousness, rather than personal history, that surface here too. Women report 'tuning into' thoughts of women in general throughout history (often as the abused/dutiful/fearful homemaker/sex-slave/single mother/witch...) and men report similar, tuning into the thoughts of men (often as the abuser/bread-winner/warrior...). Our history, of women as secondary to men,and its repercussions have affected our thoughts today about survival, sex, sexuality, self-confidence, guilt, remorse, fear, power, revenge, fairness...etc. This all takes time to release and rebalance but not until we see the influence it has had on our current lives. This can surface as feelings, images, thoughts...that come up to find their way out. What femininity and masculinity mean, and what humanity has made these terms mean, come under the magnifying glass as we reflect on what we aspired to be (or not to be) and how we judged ourselves and/or others by archetypes that now appear nonsensical. As these layers peel away, core issues begin to tremor. These are the thorniest and therefore most covered up; issues to do with mother, father, significant caregiver and sexual issues; patterns that started in childhood and continued throughout our adult life - where we often weren't aware of it. We are more comfortable - because it is more acceptable? - to talk about thought and behavior patterns connected to our parents, but our sexual issues (with this, 8 merges with 9) have been kept in the darkest recesses of our root chakra, subconscious or unseen thoughts (again, you choose your label). These areas have been hard to see throughout our lives, despite the extent to which they affect our personal relationships, because of the degree of shame and taboo that our society has appropriated them. Sexual issues start to tremor as we begin getting REALLY honest with what has happened and is happening with us. Neglect and sexual/physical/verbal abuse (whether as abuser or the abused) all start to be addressed here. Even if these extremes are not relevant, seeing echoes of our relationships with our parents in our relationships with our partners (manifested sexually and otherwise) is not a comfortable process - regardless of where on the scale of 'normal' to 'freakish' we might think them to be. As before, trust and surrender and objectively observe what is coming up to be seen is the easiest way to pass through this. Talking/working with a close friend or professional is recommended to help with these mental, physical, emotional and spiritual releases This curve is to reassure you that you are not 'losing it' but that you are going through The Shift, at the precise location of The Turning Point. The ultimate goal of which is that we are 100% cleared out of all of our old 'stuff', our garbage and our ghosts. Finally we are to live a life where we are no longer haunted, shamed or in fear of our past and where we are freely living in our present. What also resides at our core is the heavy dependence on religion, spirituality or personal development - whatever we have used to give our life greater ‘meaning'. There is a sense here of what truth is and that you have been following sheep-like many traditions or ideas because it felt like a rope in the dark. Addictions to personal development include excessive number of workshops, books, CDs, memorabilia and the thought that, "this next best thing" will answer everything; whereas The Shift brings you to the realization that only you can answer everything. That in many respects, there is 'only you'. Spiritual addictions take the form of needing statues of gods, crystals, totems, symbols, rituals, bells, whistles and Native American (or other ancient cultures’) memorabilia and souvenirs. Very often, relying on ancient ideas and spiritual tools, techniques and technologies cover up (and help you survive) the something 'uncertain' going on at a deeper level. You have never known exactly what that thing was, and you didn't know how to extract it, and yet it is causing the root of all of your suffering. But…(da daaa!!) you think you are OK because you have all of your supportive 'stuff' or ideas to 'belong' to and therefore are 'safe'. Religious addiction is adhering to beliefs where, despite recognising that there are aspects that don't make sense, they are never questioned. It also involves seeking solace in a religion without finding answers. One may convince oneself that it is part of one’s identity, but what does that mean when it keeps us in fog? What life can there be living in fog? By the time you are looking at these questions for yourself a substantial amount of head space will have been created, primarily so that you can look at these questions - they need clarity to be addressed objectively. But also because, by now, you will have acquired a distinct amount of inner strength to be able to see how these beliefs were crutches that you needed because you felt near-crippled by the experience of life up to this point. Can you see that if you think, “life is uncertain”, “evil lurks”, “the world is a frightening place”, “I'll be abused”, “people can’t be trusted” (or whatever your preferential view is), you have to have something to lean on, to carry you through, to give life some deeper meaning? However, when you see the aforementioned thoughts no longer need to exist (they are echoes of your past), and in fact they are fading from your life, you can now look at your crutches as bizarre contraptions that served a purpose but are really unnecessary now. You thank your crutches for getting you to this point but it's time to say goodbye. Your life is giving you all the deeper 'meaning' you need and you are full and complete knowing this.
9 - This is a reflective period of looking back over the curve at what has taken place. Here comes the understanding that everything that took place during our lives had its purpose, nothing was wrong, it gave us our particular experiences and gave us what we needed to learn. Even the darkest experiences that we have lived through were to teach us something, experiences to understand what it is to be human - so that we could evolve. This is the time to adjust and integrate this process into our nervous systems, knowing that we are only shown and given as much as we can handle - even if it has taken us to our limits. Perhaps we needed to go that far for the learning. One may reflect on the enormity of what is currently taking place in our lives, for humanity, for the planet and who knows how far this wave is reaching? Or what that looks like? Life will never be the same again. What on earth can that mean? What silences and stills me in a state of awe is that, being alive at this time, we are experiencing the before, during and after of a phenomenon like no other. This Shift is like undoing a ribbon on the package of our new lives. So much has been opened up and exposed to the light that we can come to a complete resolve on all levels of our lives without carrying the baggage or burden of unfinished thinking*. With all these reflections we step into 10.
10 - A place of completion and strength. If there is anything else at all remaining on any level that is to be released from our human energy field/consciousness, that needs to be faced, cleansed and purified, it is. Residues or echoes of any and all patterns and memories are dealt with as they surface. Either working alone or with a trained professional to go through this process (it helps to have the support of someone who understands it) we are ready to ask, "Is there anything else within me that needs to surface and be cleared through?". The Shift, especially at this stage, is the experience of the tail end of the Old consciousness transitioning to the New.
11 - Stepping into our new lives. Here our exterior and interior spaces are cleaned out (in these last few stages especially, colonics, detoxes and cleanses are something we feel are ‘needed‘). During sleep, rest or meditation, there is the feeling of being recalibrated and reshifted. A complete open space that can be called 'The Void' has been created where there is no knowing of 'what will happen next' or 'what will come into fill that space'. Here it is important to sit with the ‘not knowing’ in the internal and external space and know that nothing needs to be done here. There is nothing of the Old to run back to and the New has not yet been created but this is fertile ground for creating and generating the New.
12 - Where we begin to rebuild or build for the first time. Here we have inklings of ideas in our new cleared out consciousness which are guiding us to be created. Our senses are more acute and we have clear access to our own internal guidance - guidance which we now know is all we need to navigate our lives. THIS CONNECTION IS OUR SEPARATION RESTORED TO WHOLENESS From here our New self emerges.
As the curve continues beyond 12 we continue to fill our lives with clean relationships. Crucially, we continue to nurture the one with ourselves, our connection - and all aspects of our being. This is where our lives become light and easy, and situations open up for us with clarity. I am aware that in all these pages as much as I have spoken about fear, I have not spoken about love. “Your task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it.” ― Rumi Although inadvertently I have been all the time. In future writings I will go deeper into this subject. We just had a few things to get out of the way first. Until then… Elena
In compiling this map my deep thanks goes to Juanita Mazzarella and her reading of the Akashic Records, the many teachers listed on the links page and no less to the people I have known for years, months, days and even minutes who shared their lives and their thoughts about life with me so freely. *Covered further in The Science of Acting (2009), by Sam Kogan, edited by Elena Kogan and Why We Think The Way We Do and How To Change It (to be published 2013), by Thomas Garvey and Elena Kogan. |
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